You can construct your emotional reality — like you would bake a cake.
For centuries, emotions were undervalued, misunderstood, and even demonized by philosophers and theologians. They were seen as obstacles to rational thought, a view that permeated our understanding of the human psyche. It wasn’t until the modern era that psychologists began to unravel the complexities of human emotions, sparking a revolution in understanding what it means to be emotionally intelligent.
The pioneering work in affective science, particularly in the latter half of the 20th century, brought forth the discrete emotions theory. This theory, championed by psychologists like Paul Ekman, identified six basic emotions: happiness, sadness, fear, disgust, anger, and surprise. Ekman’s groundbreaking research on facial expressions provided empirical support for this theory, suggesting that these emotions were universal and could be recognized across different cultures.
Is it really just the six basic emotions?
However, while this was a significant step forward, it somewhat narrowed our view of the emotional landscape. Emotions, we’ve come to understand, are far more nuanced and intricate than a set of six distinct categories. Recognizing this limitation, a new wave of psychologists, including Lisa Feldman Barrett, began to explore a more dynamic view of emotions.
Barrett and others in the constructivist or appraisal-based camp of emotional psychology proposed a radical yet intuitive idea: emotions are not fixed entities but are constructed from a variety of psychological components. To explain this, Barrett uses a compelling metaphor – the ‘cake baking’ rule. Just as a cake’s flavor and texture depend on the combination and proportion of ingredients, our emotional experiences are formed by blending basic, fundamental elements. These elements, when mixed in different measures and conditions, produce the rich and varied spectrum of human emotions.
Why seeing emotions in this way matters
This constructivist approach to emotions has profound implications, especially for those high in emotional intelligence. When we view emotions as discrete, unchangeable categories, we limit our ability to understand and manage them. However, seeing emotions as constructions, as mixtures that we can influence and adjust, empowers us. It suggests that we are not at the mercy of our emotions but rather can shape and refine them.
Emotional intelligence, therefore, is not just about recognizing and labeling emotions accurately. It’s about understanding the ‘recipe’ behind each emotional experience and knowing how to alter the ingredients to create a more desirable outcome. This capability is crucial in personal development, leadership, and interpersonal relationships. It allows emotionally intelligent individuals to be more influential, in control, and present in their interactions.
The ‘cake baking’ rule of emotions underscores a vital truth: our emotional world is malleable. By mastering the art of mixing and balancing our emotional ingredients, we can craft a more fulfilling and controlled emotional life. This perspective not only enriches our understanding of emotions but also opens up new avenues for personal growth and effectiveness.